Disclaimer: Due to the900facebookpony and Fraidycateventing and their terrible( I mean awesome) influence on me I have started my own blog. I am sorry if I offend anyone with my language, nature, or sense of humor. That said let’s get started, okay?? And even though Remus and my adventures are core to this blog, I have to apologize in advance to tell you that my dogs, husband, cat, and even fish may be featured in this blog.
I evented as a kid but never really did much of it then a friend of mine got me back riding a few years ago and then things sort of fell into place. When Eventing Bingo came up I thought hmm. Good timing to build a blog? I have known the900facebookpony for eons (Texas, I miss you!) and she has corrupted me (I mean, been an influence on me and my horse ever since). Upcoming blog post: How she spent all my money for me!
For Bingo, I decided to use Card H (though Card J also had some stellar life choices I have done and will probably do this season such is life, decisions decisions), I decided to build on the diagonal from B to O. Let’s see where this gets us shall we??
Back story/fairy tale time Once upon a time, there was this fat buckskin quarter horse that I found in a field (really!) a few years back. He was VERY Fat. (HUGE) He had about seven fat rolls on his butt alone. The person who owned him (STILL owns him in fact but she had never really liked riding him hence the turning out in a field to eat himself silly!) was looking for someone to lease him and ride him. Meet his new long term lessor (yes that would be me). Remus is a character and most people that meet him love him. But he is definitely a character. More to come on his..um personality later.
And i know this was supposed to be fiction so here goes. Once a upon a time a fat buckskin and I went Beginner Novice, jumped clean in stadium and cross country, and got a good score on Dressage. The end (yeah so far off from ever happening it ain’t going to happen!)
HA HA so I am going to tell you some true life stories too because those are FUN (and embarrassing and humiliating) SO let’s go!
Wait this is pretty boring without images. OKAY fat photos wanted?? SURE.
Exhibit A) REMUS
OKAY I lie, but we all wanted a Thelwell when we were kids, am I right? Well guess what I got one of my very own!) (I TOLD YOU he was fat.)
Caveat: Bingo stresses me out. I hate trying to keep up with my cards, and my attention span is not great. But when Fraidy Cat posted the bingo contest I had to be in. Even if stressed!
First bingo moment: Get a 4 on movement! When I first got Remus he could not even canter under tack. With lessons and perseverance (and weight loss!), we got so we could actually canter without looking like a water buffalo tip toeing thru the tulips. We did the intro walk trot tests till I was in a coma from boredom but a year or two ago I have moved up to BN test A (and now am bored with that but we ahem have not excelled yet so we will be doing this one for a bit longer)!
I have actually gotten a few decent scores but every once in a while that dreaded 4 comes up (usually when Remus has decided there are monsters in them there woods OR when the wind or rain is blowing his tail sideways OR when a thousand kids run by on the adjacent track (Fair Hill I am looking at you). True story. My horse had a meltdown that day and I haven’t been back to Fall Fair Hill Starter trial since (I always check the track calendar and yep every September).
Another Bingo Moment: Got lost in woods (never really got lost in woods but at our last event I was pulled up and had to wait for a Rider Fall (she was fine) and I realized that it was fortunate for us because..I couldn’t find fence 10 which was right in the entrance to the woods. AS IN OH SHIT WHERE IS IT? So the jump judge is talking to me blah blah blah and I am walking Remus in a circle muttering to myself WHERE ARE YOU JUMP 10! Five seconds before she said for me to resume, I spy it! WHEW. Saved by a rider fall. (Not mine for once! win win!)
I assume if I ever go to a place with more woods than St Augustine has I will certainly get lost in the woods (I may have comprehension/memorization skills (lack of) shh..) And if I don’t get lost I can get dumped or fall off or hold on in a horrid awkward manner (noticed in some of my cross country experiences)!
Bingo Moment # 3: Chipped in extra strides We get a lot of chipped in or long strides. Remus and I are still figuring out ourselves (Yes 4-5 years later). Sometimes by the grace of God (or Remus) I manage to stay on but I have been accused of closing my eyes and grabbing mane before a jump (Remus take the wheel!)!
More often than not we get it right but once in a while. POW (no fences were harmed in this exercise but they sure had to be rebuilt a few times). HA
Then once in a while we look like this instead
Move up 5 places BINGO! This is the actual bingo spot that I moved up 5 places from dressage to place 2nd at our last event last Fall, it was total carnage in CC that day (except for us for once!) (Why you may ask was I so far behind in Dressage? See the note above about monsters in the woods at the dressage ring, um yes Remus I am asking you to bend around my inside leg not poke your nose to the outside and make yourself a backwards comma shape. SIGH.)
All and all we have fun and I giggle a lot and make an idiot of myself most times. In a field full of Warmbloods, Throughbreds and the like, a fat buckskin certainly stands out. However the most fun times, are when people ask me where I got my Connemara from!! (Besides a Thelwell I wanted a Connemara too!)